Are you fed up with narcissists? Tired of all the lies, manipulation, gaslighting and abuse? While avoiding a narcissist is best, sometimes you just need to put them in their place and show them who the real boss is.
Although most of us experience some level of narcissism, dealing with those with Narcissistic Personality Disorder can be very difficult. Attention-seeking, self-centered, and lacking in empathy, they will do anything to get what they want.
That’s why it’s important that you slap them in the face and show them where they belong.
10 ways to put a narcissist in their place
There are some tactics you can use to get a narcissist to stop manipulating and dominating your life. But this will undoubtedly be one of the toughest fights of your life.
Narcissists can be abusive and quiet at the same time, and will fight back before you stop doing their bidding. So you have to do your best. But in the end it will all be worth it.
Here are 10 tactics to put a narcissist in their place –
Be sure to check out number 9 because it will completely change the game for you.
1) Don’t get emotional
Don’t let their aggression or toxicity affect your response to situations and people. They will accuse you of being overly sensitive and emotional.
But if you do get emotional, stay calm and don’t let yourself be pressured. Let them be as angry as they want. The calmer you are, the more irritable the narcissist will be. Keep your distance and keep your composure.
2) Stop apologizing
Eliminate the word “sorry” from your vocabulary. Even though they may try to portray themselves as victims, you are the one being taken advantage of, used and abused.
Her narcissistic behavior is not your fault. If you apologize, they won’t get any better. Having to constantly apologize to de-escalate the situation only encourages you to continue abusing yourself.
Don’t keep apologizing for something you didn’t do.
3) Force her to stay on task
Narcissists indiscriminately change the subject mid-conversation to bring the focus back to themselves. They use their words skillfully to hurt and dominate you. So keep reminding them to stay on topic.
Don’t try to react or confront them because they are masters of manipulation. The moment you react, they will make you the villain in the story. So focus on the topic.
4) Give them the silent treatment
Narcissists thrive on abusing others, and they’ll keep dragging you down if you’re supposed to play their mind games. Unless they speak to you with respect and don’t treat you decently, you shouldn’t approach them.
Attention is like oxygen to narcissists. If you keep hitting them, they’re supposed to keep you trapped in their loop of abuse and blame. So refuse to talk to them until they start respecting you.
It’s a risk they can’t take if they don’t get recognition and validation from you.
5) Use her name when talking
Addressing a narcissist by their first name can help you dominate the conversation and show that you’re the boss. Repeat their name over and over during the conversation while looking into their eyes.
This can be a rather unsettling experience for the narcissist because it shows that you are not afraid of them. Use her name to take back control.
6) Take a stand
Stand up for yourself in a calm and gentle way. Tell the narcissist how their words and behavior are affecting your mental and emotional well-being. Set clear boundaries, say “no” when you want to, and let them know what is unacceptable and how you expect them to behave.
Even if the narcissist doesn’t care about your personal boundaries, be strong and protect your boundaries at all costs. But accept your battles wisely.
7) Avoid trying to defeat them
Narcissists are far too toxic for you to trick them into their own mind games. No matter how angry or frustrated you may feel, don’t stoop to their level. It only makes things worse for you and better for her.
Take control of your feelings and don’t give the narcissist an opportunity to use your feelings against you. Avoid the urge to fight back and don’t give them power over you.
8) Call them by their lies
While you should avoid confrontation, don’t hesitate to call out the narcissist when things aren’t right. Speak your concerns out loud and let them know you know their deceitful methods.
Feel free to confront them about their efforts to gaslight you and drive you crazy. Talk to your narcissists while others are around, ask them to repeat themselves, pretend you don’t understand them and ask for a written communication, audio and video record your interactions, and write things down.
Narcissists will twist the truth to get things their way, so make your communication transparent and verifiable.
9) Overcome fear
Because narcissists are abusive, they can create anxiety in us and use that fear to control us. But you don’t need to be afraid of a narcissist. Aside from their grandiose looks, narcissists are riddled with fear and insecurities.
Narcissists are fragile and frightened people who are unsettled by humiliation, rejection, and even the smallest of failures. Instead of being afraid of them or what they might do to you, realize that they are more afraid of you leaving them. Tap into your inner strength and overcome your fear of the narcissist.
10) Focus on yourself, not her
People with narcissistic personality disorder love to attract the attention of others. Instead of forcing yourself to sacrifice your needs to find others’ needs, focus on your own mental, physical, and emotional needs.
Don’t tailor your life to meet their need for attention. Don’t let the narcissist shape your self-esteem. Practice self-care and self-love. Invest in your other relationships and focus on yourself instead of fixing them.
That’s how it’s done!
These are 10 simple and solid tactics that can help you put a narcissist in their place and build a more positive and healthy life for you.
Have you ever dealt with a narcissist? What tactics did you use to deal with them? Let us know by leaving a comment below.