How to be the best friend your husband ever had and addicting him …
Every man is unique and has different preferences when it comes to the woman with whom he wants to have a relationship. So all men look for other things in women. But there are a few similarities that almost every man expects from a romantic partner.
Understanding what your boyfriend thinks and what exactly he needs in the relationship can help you tremendously to build a stronger bond and become the best partner he has ever been with.
“If you fight like married people, talk like best friends, flirt like new lovers, protect each other like siblings, then you are made for each other.”
Like women, men want different things from a relationship. One may prefer a clingy woman … the kind of woman who gets angry when he doesn’t call or write back. Or the kind of woman who comes home early, makes dinner and waits for him in bed without a bra.
Another guy, probably from Jamaica, may want a woman who can smoke pot and party until dawn.
The point is: Men want different things from women.
But when it comes to love, we’re all sentimental to a certain extent and we all want pretty much the same thing.
I am sure that many magazines and blogs have published instructions on how to be a good friend, and you have probably read a few. But I still want to go into more detail about what makes a good friend – so here we go:
1. Have a lot of self-respect and don’t lose your dignity.
In my opinion, the top rule for being loved is first of all to love yourself.
Sure, it sounds a bit self-centred, but if you don’t respect yourself, you can’t expect someone else to do it for you – or show you respect. Men find independent women extremely attractive.
So be independent – even in your demeanour. Let him understand that you love him, but you don’t necessarily need him. Draw clear boundaries and don’t hesitate to point it out if he behaves like an asshole.
Be bold enough to express your feelings and defend your position. Being a little attached is one thing, being a weakling is a completely different story.
2. Understand the difference between support and control.
Setbacks are inevitable in life and your friend is also not immune to them. Sometimes things are just difficult, and no matter how hard he tries, nothing really works. It is important to understand that this is only a phase and you have to learn to accept it.
As his girlfriend, you have to stand by his side. He needs you now more than ever. However, a common mistake women make is to go too far. Making decisions for him just because he is currently vulnerable is not support.
Stop ordering him around. Things are hard enough for him, so don’t make it worse. Instead, speak to him in an encouraging way, look for solutions with him and, above all, do not underestimate him.
“We don’t find love in a perfect person, but in learning to see a non-perfect person perfectly.”
3. Give him space.
If your friend goes to a party with his friends and does not invite you, he does it because it is fun and makes him happy and not because he wants to avoid you.
If he is texting on his cell phone and you are not allowed to see it, it is because it is private and not your business and not because he is flirting with the blonde next door.
Trust is important in a relationship. However hard it is, stop trying to doubt his intentions as best you can. If you have a problem with his behavior, respond to it in an adult manner rather than snooping around. Not only will you win his trust, you will also save yourself some anger, drama and sleepless nights.
4. Handle disputes in an adult manner.
Love is like a hilly landscape, it goes up and down – and when it comes to disputes, it is only natural that they also occur with you.
And honestly, if you never quarrel with your boyfriend, your relationship is likely to fail. Disputes are at the heart of every relationship; through them our voice is heard.
In addition, you cannot expect everything to run smoothly. You are not Romeo and Juliet. Occasional disputes are a necessary evil in the long run. However, it is important to be mature when they occur.
When he addresses a problem and you argue, you need to understand that he wants you to understand something about him or the relationship – he doesn’t want to hurt you on purpose. Try to be a good listener, forgive and forget and don’t spread your dirty laundry on social networks.
5. Stick to your own interests and passions.
In addition to the relationship, you have your own life. Change your look from time to time, keep fit, eat healthy, make a career, stay on trend etc. etc. You are solely responsible for what you do with your life. So explore everything.
Don’t let any relationship stop you from doing anything, but actively involve your friend if it makes sense. For example, you can ask him if he’s going on a short trip with your friends, or ask him for his opinion on things … anything that assures him that his opinion means something to you.
As silly as it sounds, he likes to know that you value his opinion. The more active you are in your own life, the more lively your relationship will be.
As I said before, we’re all different in terms of taste. In matters of the heart, there is simply no cheat sheet. It is important that you evaluate your relationship and fully understand your partner. Then you can play according to your own rules to make things work.
Learn to love from your heart and not to use the relationship as a tool to fill a broken part inside of you. Find a balance of emotions and thoughts and confidently approach the love between you two. A
As an addition: Do not try to make your partner jealous in the hope of luring a reaction out of him as a proof of love. I know that in the film it works out fine, but usually you shouldn’t do it at home.
“The best person in your life is yourself, the second-best is another who believes in you.”
Being the perfect girlfriend is really not that difficult. Follow the tips above and your husband will get addicted to you in no time. However, keep in mind that a relationship needs to be nurtured and that you have to give it love and attention every day.
Most importantly, make sure you stay true to yourself so that you don’t become another person trying to impress your husband. Love yourself as you are, love him as he is, and enjoy the love that naturally flows in the relationship.
That is the way to happiness.