It’s not like you’re too fat or too thin. It’s not because you’re too sloppy or too prude. It has nothing to do with the size of your breasts or your thighs or stomach.
It’s not that you’re too successful or not successful enough. You could spend your whole life wondering what you did wrong, or what was not good enough for you, or what other women had, what you lacked.
You will never find the answer. Because everything is right with you. It’s not that you’re not pretty enough or smart enough or confident enough. It’s not about your finances, your job or your friends.
You are exactly as you should be. You are perfect, even under all your imperfections and weaknesses. As long as you have the thirst for life, the desire to work hard and truly live, and the will to grow and improve and to try more every day, you are exactly what you should be.
You will never be enough for him because even the most perfect, most flawless woman in the world – who does not exist – would not be enough for him.
He is it. He belongs to a certain race of men. A breed that does not want to accept you as you are because it is afraid to interrupt the hunt. He is afraid to settle down and try to find the true form of love, the form in which your love for him is so deep that you learn to accept and love him as he is. The form of love that is so deep that its beauty shines from the inside out.
This sort of person is afraid to stop and try to find that love. It is not necessarily the love he is afraid of. It is stopping. He is afraid to stop and discover that he may never find that kind of love. He rejected you because he’s afraid of rejecting himself.
Not all men belong to this breed, only a small number. These fears of intimacy and rejection are not unique to men. There are also such women. There are people like this all over the world – people who always find problems no matter who they meet with, people who can not accept anyone who is not perfect. Because they unconsciously know that they will never find this person. The high standards and the fact that nobody is good enough will keep them safe. It will leave her alone.
That should not be an excuse, that does not mean that you are flawless, that does not mean that you should have no responsibility in your relationships. You have to make an effort and make compromises, you have to be vulnerable, you have to put the other person in front of you. You have to work, sometimes you have to be selfless, you have to acknowledge that you have mistakes, that you have made mistakes and will continue to do so.
But sometimes, no matter how hard you try, you find yourself desperately in love with someone who can not fall back on you. Someone who refuses to accept you, because it is easier to make you think that something is wrong with him than that he is vulnerable and human and open to the idea of being hurt.
You can not change it. You can not fix it. You can not fix yourself. Because you can not apologize for who you are. You should not question what’s wrong with you, what you miss or what you need to change.
Someone who truly loves you, someone who is really right for you, will not force you to look inward and search for what’s wrong with you, what it is, what needs to be changed. A person who truly loves you will take you outside of yourself. She will lead you out into the world. It will make you want more for yourself – more luck, more knowledge, more adventure, more experience. The list is endless. It will inspire and support you and inspire you to be better, instead of trapping yourself in your own head and wondering how to change yourself to make them happy.
If you have found true love, you will know it. Because you will always be enough, regardless of your mistakes, uncertainties and vulnerabilities. You will definitely be enough for him. And he will be enough for you.
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