Why do so many couples give up during this phase of the relationship
Many couples fail in a certain phase of the relationship. They split up because they just can’t get through this phase. In this article, you will find out which phase it is that represents a major obstacle for so many couples and which phases there are at all.
We all want to experience this real, raw, deep, lasting, unique kind of love. We all want to find that one person who loves us honestly, intensely, and unconditionally and accepts us for who we are. We want to find a person who makes us feel loved, respected, and whole. The person who makes our lives happier and more meaningful and exciting. We all want to find one or the other.
The real question, however, is: what happens when you finally find this person?
Many people believe that when you are in a relationship with the right person, it should be easy. They believe that love should feel effortless and that everything should work out naturally. Well, part of it is true, it should at least feel non-toxic and be extremely complicated, but the relationship can only be “perfect” to a certain extent. Because the truth is that love is never a smooth journey.
There are a total of 5 phases of love that all couples go through partially or in some cases even completely. And the reason a lot of couples end their relationship is that they can’t get through stage 3 and then break up.
Here are the 5 stages of love:
1st phase: passion and infatuation
From the moment you feel the first butterflies in your stomach for someone, to the moment you have that first and unforgettable romantic kiss, and until you become physically intimate for the first time, everything turns in the first phase about infatuation and passion.
This is the phase when your hormones go wild and you just can’t stop thinking about the person you’re so deeply in love with. It’s also the phase when you can’t wait to spend time with your partner, and when you hope that time never ends. This stage is easy as everything seems perfect and there are no problems yet. The partners seem to be looking at everything through rose-colored glasses. They don’t believe the other could be flawed.
2nd phase: It’s getting serious
This is where things get serious. It’s the phase where the couple still cuddles during a movie and happily exchanges kisses and hugs when they’re together, but something has changed. They may even have moved in together or got married and started a family. In this phase, the connection between the partners becomes deeper and more meaningful. They also feel more comfortable showing each other their vulnerable sides, and most importantly, they feel free and comfortable when they can talk about anything.
3rd phase: Everyday life and real-life put love to the test
Now the couple is entering the critical phase. This is the phase when many couples go their separate ways. Because the love killer number one enters the relationship – namely everyday life. The honeymoon phase has come to an end and parenting, family commitments, and work problems have moved into focus. The couple is starting to wonder where all of the passion and excitement they both used to enjoy went to.
They still remember the good times, but can hardly believe that they can be returned to. At this point, a lot of couples say the air is out. The small and seemingly unimportant things that were found to be annoying about the partner now seem to be big problems. You start to argue and get annoyed about little things. You also feel tense or even trapped. At this stage, many couples wonder whether they made the right decision and whether they might be better off being single.
4th phase: acceptance and understanding
If the couple survived phase 3, both partners will begin to see and accept each other for who they really are. In phase 4, they begin to accept each other’s insecurities, fears, and mistakes. They realize that the partner is not a perfect person and that just like you, they are flawed.
In this phase, both are also eager to find ways to both save the relationship and resolve personal problems. And both ensure that the relationship is based on mutual acceptance, understanding, patience, and compassion.
5th phase: the dream team
After both have accepted each other’s mistakes and rediscovered the other’s qualities and desires, both partners can work together as a team. At this stage, both of them realize that they can be happy and fulfilled if they have different goals and passions. They both also show that they are ready to work on the relationship together, rekindle the flame of romance, and keep the love in the partnership forever.