We spoke to Alex Williamson from the dating app Bumble about the perfect profile, first dates and the best way to start a conversation online
Getting to know someone in real life is not that easy – but completely new challenges come up, especially on the Internet: Which pictures do I upload and what do I write in my profile? Where are the best places to meet for our first date? Expert Alex Williamson, Vice President, Brand Content at Bumble , gave us valuable tips that can make online dating easier.
girlfriend: What are good first sentences for women to start a conversation?
Alex Williamson: You shouldn’t say “Hi, how are you?” or “How’s your day” start. Sentences that encourage deeper conversation are definitely better. If you don’t dare to do that, a “Hi, how are you” or a smiley emoticon is of course also ok. A beer or wine smiley with a question mark or an interesting aspect from the user profile always work very well. Questions about the dog or what mountain it climbed in the photo is a great way to start a conversation. Therefore it is also important to have a well-filled profile with different pictures. That makes it a lot easier to pick out an interesting aspect.
Freundin: What are your tips for the perfect profile?
Alex Williamson: The first picture should always be a smiling portrait of you. Better to be closer than further away so that other users can see your face clearly. If you don’t usually wear a lot of makeup, then you shouldn’t do that in the photos either. The pictures should show who you really are.
Timeliness is also very important: if you upload a picture of yourself showing you with red hair three years ago, it no longer corresponds to the blonde person who is now on the date. We also advise against taking professional pictures, at least for the first picture, because these quickly appear unreachable and men do not dare to talk to you. The other pictures in the profile should reflect your own personality. Do you enjoy reading a book in a cafe? Then show it in your profile. Dogs are always a plus! Pictures with people you love are also very important. The fifth or sixth picture can therefore be a group picture with friends. At this point it is also well placed because you are already showing your face in the first pictures and you can be identified in the group picture.
We have also noticed something else: women should not show photos with male persons, be it the brother, the cousin or the best friend in profile. This could confuse interested men and lead them to believe that you already have a partner.
In the biography should be written on no account things you do not want. It’s not fun to click through a profile that says I like this and not that. You don’t want to meet the requirements before you’ve even said hello. We therefore recommend staying positive and friendly and showing your own personality. An amusing sentence, anecdote or a funny quirk always goes down well.
Freundin: How do you stay safe when dating online?
Alex Williamson: Before you meet for the first time, it’s best to start talking on the phone or video chatting. There are many ways to break out of text-based conversation these days. And then you should definitely always inform a friend of the meeting point and time before you meet someone.
Freundin: What tips are there for the first date in real life?
Alex Williamson: It’s best to meet in the afternoon. So you can go for a drink or take the dog for a walk together. And when things don’t go well, you can just say the dog has to go home and say goodbye is easier. If things go well, the date can even drag on into the evening when you go out to eat together.
It is important not to build up pressure that this exact date will lead to a long-term relationship. Stay open-minded and just see what the connection boils down to. Maybe he will just become a great friend, a business contact or maybe you will get to know the love of your life through him. If you stay open, the ways in which you can benefit from the date are limitless.
If the first date went well, let him know. You don’t need to be artificially adorned and only write back after three days so as not to show too much interest. That’s nonsense. The new rules of dating are that there are no rules!