The 7 Stages Of A Toxic Friendship
Friends are the people we have in life because we value them, love them, and because they are nice to spend time with.
And although arguments, disagreements, and arguments are a normal part of a relationship and do not make a relationship bad, recurring problems not only damage the quality of the friendship, but also our enjoyment of life.
If friendship with someone drains you, saps your energy, and makes you unhappy, chances are it’s toxic.
How can you tell if it’s just a temporary problem that can be solved or if your friend is a toxic friend?
The difference between the two is very difficult to tell and you may feel like you are having a hard time dealing with this relationship and unsure whether it is a toxic friendship or not.
These are the 7 Stages of Toxic Friendships that explain in detail how toxic friends behave.
Phase 1: Subtle changes
If this is a long-term friendship, the main thing to look for is a change in energy.
When you think about a particular friendship, you may find that some of the things you used to get—joy, stimulation, support—just aren’t there anymore.
Or maybe the friendship has become very unbalanced when one of you is more successful or has achieved certain life goals before the other.
Phase 2: lack of energy
Do you feel mentally or physically exhausted when you are with this person?
Are you physically and mentally exhausted?
Do they seem to be negative about your accomplishments or joys, as if constantly trying to criticize or downplay your circumstances?
Eliminating negative energy from life is absolutely essential to our well-being, and that includes toxic relationships with old friends.
It is important to assess whether this friend supports you or doubts you.
Stage 3: Toxic attraction
Are you attracted to this person? Are you wondering why you allowed the drama to go on for so long?
Could it be that by keeping this toxic person in your life, your own unhealthy needs are being met?
Does being in a relationship with this person help you feel less lonely, helpful, important, or superior?
Sometimes we equate toxic friends with people from our past—like a critical teacher, an unreachable parent, or a rival sibling.
Stage 4: He takes advantage of you
The manipulations begin. Does it seem like he wants to take advantage of you, or is he already taking advantage of you in some way?
Are you constantly looking for a service? This is a sign that he sees you as an object rather than a person. This is a definite sign of a toxic friend.
Stage 5: Loyalty
Has loyalty gone? If you have mutual friends, pay attention to how your so-called friend talks negatively about you behind your back.
This type of behavior is toxic, but also very clear. People who gossip and spread stories are trying to divide and rule. They are trying to create two fronts fighting each other.
Stage 6: Passive-aggressive behavior
This phase takes the form of praise and compliments, but these are not well-intentioned. A more subtle form of hostile behavior is when someone is passively aggressive.
Such friends say things that sound pleasant or helpful but are actually negative or wrong. Also, they can be very resilient to whatever plans you propose.
Addressing such behavior is difficult because the passive side of the conversation is intentionally designed to appear threatening.
Stage 7: Competition
Has your friend become your competitor in everything you do? This can show up through smaller things like copying your fashion style or your social or life choices.
Some fake friends also copy your career or pastimes. Of course, he tries to be better than you at everything. This can be very tiring as they try to take over a part of you.
Do you brag about the things you have gained or achieved to suggest that you have achieved less in your life?
This attempt to belittle you is a way for toxic friends to feel superior.
It is important to keep in mind that this person is one of the obstacles to your inner peace and good sanity.
End this toxic friendship!
Remove Them From Your Life And Move On Suppose you have the power to remove this toxic person from your life.
Well, first of all, take a deep breath, give yourself time, and remember that you are not alone. You may cry over the loss of that friend. You could be sad for days.
But excessive rumination can sometimes drive you up the wall and prevent you from moving on and feeling better. You may wonder if something is wrong with you, and you may feel even worse.
But remember, toxic friends, manipulate you in this way and destroy your self-esteem.
If you don’t feel comfortable in a friendship, you’re better off without it. Sometimes you need to change your mindset and actively move towards something healthier.
End such a friendship as soon as possible!
After all, friends come and go, but the only relationship that lasts is the one you have with yourself.
If you don’t feel respected, be kind to yourself and stay away from the bad atmosphere so you can get closer to the people who truly deserve your time.
Everyone fights sometimes and has a bit of toxicity in them. Humans are not perfect beings and we all sometimes look worse than we really are.
But if we strive to be better every day and if we take care of ourselves and our mental state, then we can only be good to others and they to us.
Ending a toxic friendship frees energy, but also makes room for other, healthier people to come into our lives and facilitate a warm, honest, and fulfilling relationship.
Reviewing friendships allows you to set boundaries, which means you’ll be more careful in the future. It doesn’t have to be dramatic, you can also break off contact elegantly.