Lovesickness is one of the most painful feelings we can experience. With these 5 first aid tips from lovesickness coach Simone Sauter, you can overcome it faster
Overcoming lovesickness is not that easy
1. Accept that you are in a state of emotional emergency
If you are currently lovesick, you are in a situation where you should be especially loving with yourself. It is perfectly normal that you are tired and not as productive as usual, because your body and mind need a lot of energy to endure and process the pain and fears that result from the loss. In our society, unfortunately, lovesickness is not yet recognized and is dismissed with empty phrases like “You’ll find someone again” and sometimes ridiculed. Get away from these people and find people who understand you. Try to accept that lovesickness is an emotional state of emergency and that it will pass even if you cannot imagine it at the moment.
2. Cry!
This may sound very succinct at first, but it is essential for your healing and also to avoid getting physically sick. Lovesickness is very challenging not only emotionally, but also physically. Your body has to deal with very high levels of stress hormones and crying helps it because – as simple as it may sound – tears carry these stress hormones out of the body. Another effect is the production of endorphins, morphine produced by the body that has an analgesic effect. If we don’t cry, we increase the risk of, for example, insomnia, heartburn, back pain, stomach ache, headache, or gastrointestinal disorders.
And no, crying has nothing to do with weakness, whether you are a woman or a man.
Tears help
3. Write a diary!
Especially with lovesickness, we are overwhelmed by thoughts and feelings, some of which we can no longer assign: Old memories, fears and longings follow us every step of the way. If you feel this way, it helps if you keep a journal in which you simply write down your thoughts and feelings. This will help you clear your head – in the truest sense of the word! If you are lovesick, try to get as much out of your head as possible on paper, so that you give yourself more space for healing thoughts and inner peace.
Writing a diary is just as happy as chatting with friends
4. Create routines!
When we suffer from lovesickness, especially after a longstanding relationship, one of the most oppressive feelings is a loss of control because we feel like our entire lives are off track. If you feel like this, then create daily routines for yourself. These can be as simple as a precise process after getting up, after work, and especially for the weekends, which are often the worst. Routines make us feel safe because we know what to do next. They counteract the feeling that our life is out of control and help us to develop security and stability.
Writing a diary is just as happy as chatting with friends
4. Create routines!
When we suffer from lovesickness, especially after a longstanding relationship, one of the most oppressive feelings is the loss of control because we feel like our entire lives are off track. If you feel like this, then create daily routines for yourself. These can be as simple as a precise process after getting up, after work, and especially for the weekends, which are often the worst. Routines make us feel safe because we know what to do next. They counteract the feeling that our life is out of control and help us to develop security and stability.
This is why you should exercise during your period
5. Learn to love yourself!
Have you ever wondered what lovesickness actually is? My personal definition after many years of coaching is: Lovesickness is the pain we feel when we realize how much we have lost the connection to ourselves because we have focused too much on connecting with another person. It is part of your job to take care of yourself now and to get back into a loving connection with yourself. If you are lovesick, ask yourself several times a day: What do I need now to feel better? Sometimes you will not be able to feel the feeling as it is overlaid with pain and sadness. Then I advise you to move. Through physical exercise, you also give your mind and your emotions the opportunity to move,
Take care of yourself now!
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