I was in love. It was my first and only love. When I was with him, my world felt better. In any case, for a period of our relationship. Then I noticed that the direction we went in changed, his plans did not agree with mine and that we are still young. He started gaining control, or maybe I finally realized he was in control, and as much as it hurt me, I had to let go.
After my tears had gone down, I started to get interested in guys I had nothing to do with.
I started looking for love because I did not want to be alone.
I stayed in the homes of mates so I would not have to sleep alone. I searched and forced connections that were not really there, and I spent so much time convincing myself that I was happy when I was not really.
I tried to tell my head and heart that I did not miss my ex, I tried to tell myself that things were so much better while praying that no one heard me crying in the shower because I was strong wanted to.
I wanted to make it look like this because I did not want some months to go by and people think I’m weak or pathetic or tell me to keep going.
But what I did not know then is that you can not patch up a broken heart in a certain amount of time. One can feel the pain and the sadness as long as one needs it.
You have no expiration date; You do not wake up one morning and suddenly forget how he made you feel.
Learning to live without someone who has started to build your life is not easy to overcome. I did not know what to do with my feelings, I tried to be strong on the outside while feeling so weak inside. I was convinced it was a mistake to break up with him, but he kept going so fast while I tried to find the fragmented parts of my heart.
Then the loneliness set in. Feeling alone makes one think irrational things. You start to fall in love with every person you show interest in or with any person who shows interest in you.
There is no stability or sign of commitment, but there is a fire burning and the flame is what keeps you warm in those moments. Lust is sloppy and needy, you have no real emotional connection, but you feel as if you need it.
You should be alone after separating, you should be alone as long as you need to heal. In the end, the pain of your heartbreak will no longer scream in your ear as much as you missed your ex, as in the past.
There are some people who never get over someone they love and that’s fine too. But before you start a new relationship, you should be ready for it. You should resign yourself to being alone and finding out who you are now as a person. You should find out what makes you happy and what you want or do not want in a future partner.
The love that arises out of loneliness is not a loved one wants to be in.
You should go out with someone with whom you could be forever happy, because what good is it to go out with someone if you can not imagine marriage to him?
Know your value. Know when you are ready to plunge into a new love. Do not dive if you can not bind yourself completely. You should fall in love when you’re ready to fall in love with the same person millions of times. You should fall in love when you are ready to fall in love with the same person every day.
You should fall in love when the sight of him makes your bad day better, you should fall in love when the sound of his laughter makes you laugh and you should fall in love when you wake up every morning and he is by your side.
Pay attention to who you are when you are alone because being alone is important. It helps you to find your strength and to learn who you really are, it makes you realize that it is better to be alone than with someone who is not fully involved. So please, do not let your loneliness lead you into the arms of someone you can not do anything with. Stay alone, you’ll be surprised how much it can teach you.
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