You don’t want the ex back because he just wasn’t the right person. But you still miss him a lot. Here’s what you can do for the heartache
Sometimes – even if your stomach is full of butterflies and you really want to – you realize deep in your heart that the relationship is not the right one. The voice in the back of the head may be very soft, but it is mostly correct. There are two ways to deal with this: either you listen to this voice or you ignore it. But at some point, when the inevitable can no longer be postponed, such a relationship reaches its natural end. He just wasn’t the right person and that hurts. You can do that now.
Convince your heart
When a relationship ends, you often feel lost. Even when the head says the decision was right, the heart feels betrayed and empty. I would like to go back. Back to physical affection and emotional connectedness. While the heart often simply needs time, the brain needs input. And that’s exactly how you can trick your heart.
Make a list and get into it
Experts recommend keeping a so-called “stability list” after a separation. Write down as precisely as possible what bothered you about the relationship and the partner. For example, “He listened very badly to me and ignored my needs. That made me feel like I wasn’t important to him.” Specific examples also help.
The memories of these situations will bring back the feelings and keep you from romanticizing the relationship in your head. You will be stable in your decision.
Get through the heartbreaking detox phase
How long you have to teach your heart reason is unfortunately not to be said in general terms. Normally, “weaning” takes four to six weeks. Then, according to experts, the worst is over and you can slowly begin to reorganize and realign your life. However, it is important not to put yourself under pressure. Because processing a breakup – even if it was from the wrong partner – is much more complex than you think.