People with a hard shell often don’t let other people touch their feelings. They look cool and distant on the outside, but on the inside, they are like everyone else. They just want to be loved.
1. You keep the feeling of shame inside.
Even if they respond to your compliments with a quick “thank you” and a look away, it’s not because they don’t appreciate it, it’s the opposite. They are grateful to you for every single word. It’s just that they internalize it a little more.
2. You prefer to show something through action rather than tell it.
People often have the idea that men (and women) with a hard shell simply have no feelings – but it is precisely the strength of their feelings that makes it so difficult for them to talk about them. If they started talking about their feelings, maybe they would shed a few tears.
So if you think they are not from this planet and you try to have emotional conversations with them, they will be the first to snuggle up to show you their feelings.
3. They will try to please you with attentive gestures.
Since they are not so good at talking about their feelings, they will try to show you how they feel. Think of all the sweet surprises like breakfast in bed or the news when you’re out with your friends – anything that lets you know they’re thinking of you. And they will do it for a long time.
4. They appreciate their place.
If you don’t suffocate them at the start of the relationship, they’ll feel more drawn to you. Ultimately, they’ll want to get rid of the space between you two – but they need to take the time to make sure that they can trust you fully.
5. Although they have built walls around them, they are there for a reason.
People with a hard shell can often look cool and indifferent as if they don’t need anyone. But it is often an act they perform to hide the previous heartache.
6. They are not interested in showing themselves in public.
The things that are characteristic of these types of people are simple, powerful actions, such as keeping eye contact with you in a room full of people, or just standing a little closer to you so that your arms touch lightly. It is something invisible to others, but visible to both of you.
7. When you are with them, they will make you feel unique.
Your attention is reserved for few people, but that’s why it’s all the more intense. If you walk around on a hectic street with them, you won’t even notice that other people are there.
8. They know how to defeat their struggles.
They will just let go of the small, unimportant things without giving them the opportunity to multiply. But if they tell you a problem, it means they are really hurt.
9. When they argue with you, they really care about you.
The positive side is that if they address any problem, it must mean that they really care about you and the relationship. On the contrary, they wouldn’t have told you anything at all. But if they have tried hard enough and still feel that they are not important to you, they will withdraw as much as possible – to the point where your presence becomes pretty unimportant.
10. You are incredibly loyal.
At the end of the day, they will move mountains for you. They will be there for the little things, like a promotion or a raise. But they will also be the ones who go to the doctor with you or help you take your things with you when you move to a new apartment.